So, I've Been Thinking...

Recently, I've been thinking a bit about loss...

Particularly, what I have been thinking about is the old adage: It is better to have loved and lost, then never to have loved at all.

But how applicable is this philosophy when extended beyond the emotion of love?

I have been working with adults with developmental disabilities lately- you know, people with Down's Syndrome, autism, mental retardation, etc...but I also have been working with a guy that was a pretty smart, albeit a little wild, normal guy until he sustained a tramautic brain injury from an accident involving drunken driving...

So I have been contemplating: which is worse, or conversely, better? Would I have rather been born with a developmental disability, growing up without ever truly realizing or understanding the loss(?) of normal cognitive functioning (whatever that is), or to have lived a normal life until waking up one day in a hospital bed and struggling with the new, deminished mental functions?

I don't know which is worse. Actually, they would both have different negative aspects. My developmentally disabled guys (at least some of them) are cognitively functional enough to realize they are developmentally disadvantaged and have not developed fully functional cognitive abilities- this would seem to be a serious life-long hardship in that you would know that you are missing something, but not fully cognizant of what it is.

On the other hand, my brain-injury guy has the constant reminder of what he had and has lost, and I have seen the emotional effects it can have (he has been torturing himself about it for 19 years!).

So which is worse: knowing you are missing somehing and not sure what it is, or knowing that you are missing something and knowing exactly what it is?

Would I rather love and lose or never love at all?

I honestly don't know...